593: Why So Many Entrepreneurs Hit A Wall And How to Break Through

00:00
Welcome back to the podcast, the show where I cover all of the latest strategies and current events related to e-commerce and online business. In this episode, Tony and I dive deep into what it really feels like to get stuck. Even when your business is working and life looks successful on the outside. We talk about those weird moments when motivation disappears, clarity fades, and you start questioning everything. If you’ve ever felt like you’re going through the motions or hitting a wall in your business journey,

00:28
This episode is a raw honest look at how to reset, refocus, and find momentum again. But before we begin, I wanted to let you know that the session recordings for Seller Summit 2025 are now available over at sellersummit.com. If you missed the event, you can now get instant access to every keynote, workshop, and panel. Now onto the show.

00:56
Welcome to the My Wife Quit Her Job podcast. Today, Tony and I, we’re gonna cover something a little different. I just turned 50 and I know a lot of people in our classes or people in my audience have been kind of stuck. mean, things are changing so fast. So how do you know what direction to take and what to do when you’re feeling a little bit stuck? Yeah, I think everybody has been stuck at some point. In fact,

01:23
I know we have some people in the class where we’ve talked them sort of through this over the years. So I think it’s, you know, in honor of your 50th birthday. Did I tell you what happened on my 50th Yes, you did. I don’t think you’ve told the listeners. All right. So I went to see the doctor on my 50th, just so I could get my blood work done and whatnot. And as I’m in line, Bumblebee Linens goes down and I’m like, what the heck is going on? What the heck’s going on? And like,

01:53
I didn’t have anything. was at the doctor and I, know, doctors, right? You have to wait in line for a long time to get blow. I did not want to leave the line. Meanwhile, you know, we’re not making money while the website’s down. And then I discovered that support for my, uh, my web host has gotten a little bit worse. Right. But then I’m on the, I’m on the phone with, uh, with support. Finally, I get through.

02:19
So I’m waiting in line and as I’m getting my blood drawn, I’m actually on the phone with support. Turns out someone decided to just attack my site that day. As As a birthday gift. And there was like a very subtle bug that’s been on my website. It’s probably been there for like 15 years, because I’ve never gotten attacked in this way before. Basically filled up the hard drive of my server and then caused it to go down.

02:47
But why do they always decide to do this on special days? Stuff like this always happens on vacation when I’m does seem to happen you on vacation a decent amount. Yeah, on vacation, but then this time on my birthday. The morning was stressful. is it because you are doing something, it feels stressful to like… It happens when you’re at home, it doesn’t feel as stressful because you can just handle it, but when you’re out, it becomes a much bigger deal because it’s harder to deal with.

03:16
No, absolutely not. It’s not that. I mean, these things that happen when we get attacked, this is very unusual. So anyway, that was my birthday. Anyway, it got me thinking though. Is it all worth it? I was just thinking because like I’ve been reflecting a lot. So my best friend came and came up on my birthday and we hung out. Then we started talking about all this stuff, like what to do next. Because things are

03:45
I’m just really worried about AI and how it’s just changing. I’m more worried for my kids actually, how it’s taking away jobs and whatnot. I know there’s probably a lot of people listening to this who are stuck wondering what to do, AI is coming. I don’t know, let’s talk about it. I also noticed that, I don’t want to say this is like an epidemic of people being stuck, but I know we had a lot of people who didn’t attend Seller Summit this year for the same reasons. They felt like they were stuck, they didn’t have anything to offer.

04:15
they felt like they weren’t ready to make any changes in their business, stuff like that. I think this is happening to a lot of people. don’t think this is, if you’re feeling this way, like not you, but like you plural, I feel like you’re not alone. There’s probably a lot of people who are in your same boat. And I was actually feeling this way. For me, it’s funny. I always feel this way over the holidays. I don’t know why my birthday and Christmas and New Year’s are all like within a week of each other. And for some reason, that’s when

04:43
Like I love Christmas and I love the holidays, but it’s also when I’m like definitely the most depressed. And I don’t know if it’s because like another year has gone by and maybe I feel like I haven’t reached my potential or I’ve missed out on something or, but I always get really down in the dumps right around the new year as opposed to be like, most people are like excited and like doing all their like goal setting and I’m like, everything sucks. And I actually.

05:09
It’s so funny, I had a conversation yesterday with somebody about this very thing because usually for my birthday, I like to take a little trip, do something fun. I was literally dreading going on this trip this year because I just wanted to stay home and just feel sorry for myself because I was in that rut. I didn’t know that. You didn’t tell me that. I know. don’t tell anybody. The other thing is, I think this is step one. Normally when people feel this way, they keep it to themselves.

05:38
Right, because I think it’s a little bit embarrassing, especially, I actually don’t think it’s embarrassing, I think people feel like it’s embarrassing. Because I think to myself, why should I feel this way? My life is pretty good. I have successful businesses, I can feed my family, I’m getting to do the things I wanna do in life. So why should I not be happy with where I am? Or why should I feel like I’m not where I’m supposed to be?

06:06
And I think the thing that really helped me like when I was feeling this way over the holidays was that I went on the trip, even though I was I was like, if I wasn’t such a people pleaser, I would. This is a trip to Europe, right? A trip to New York and Vegas with our friends, Adam and Liz. And I was and I also was like, I don’t want to go hang out with people and have to pretend like my life is great. Right. Like I don’t want to have to go and talk about, my business is amazing, blah, blah, So.

06:35
You know what really was the the breakthrough for me was I admitted to Adam and Liz while we were together that I didn’t want to be there. And if you’ve ever. Why would you do that? know you’re like, no, I’m surprised you have any friends. Better not say that to me next week. No, I just I was like really honest. And I think this is step one is is Adam, Liz or some of my closest friends. So I will say this needs to be with a trusted friend group. This cannot be with like

07:05
the random neighbor that you decided to stop by. I don’t really wanna be talking to you right now. But we were at dinner and I said, know, I really didn’t wanna do this trip. I feel like I’m not in a good place right now. I feel like I kinda don’t know what direction I wanna go in. And I felt like coming on this trip was just perpetuating this false perception, right? And it felt really good to admit it, right? And I think that if you have, I think that’s the step one is if you have someone in your life that is a good friend,

07:34
someone in a mastermind group, maybe it’s even like a family member that you’re close with, right? To just say, hey, like I’m really feeling like lost and stuck right now. Like I don’t know what direction I should go to or go. I don’t know where my business should be right now. I feel like I should be in a different place. Being able to say that out loud actually lifted like this huge weight off me. And as soon as I said it, it was almost like, oh, now I’m kind of happy to be here, right? It was like I could be honest about it and then take the next step.

08:03
That’s interesting. I don’t know if I can relate to that. Admitting admitting a fault. I don’t know. Admitting weakness. I’m just thinking to myself. So I’ve been getting this way because, you know, my kids are are getting older and they’re to be out of the house. And I’m thinking to myself.

08:27
As long as I can remember, they are my life. I would say 60 % of my brain right now thinks about them, their future, and all that stuff, what we’re gonna be doing together. And only a small portion of my brain is actually with the business. I think about the business most of the time. And it’s tough. I listened to a podcast the other day.

08:57
where the guy was talking about just getting older and he was like, yeah, you’re go to a lot more funerals than what, I’m like, why am listening to this stuff? That’s definitely not our recommendation if you’re feeling stuck. Listen to a very depressing podcast. Maybe it’s just cause I feel like 50 is a milestone. It is cause you realize that like definitely half your life is over. Yes.

09:25
You’ll probably live to be like 100. You’ll be some old Chinese man. like for most of us. So when my best friend came came up, we were like, do we want to live to 100? Also, yeah, maybe not. Depends on the quality of life. So, I mean, you saying things out loud made you feel better. I have yet to find a conversation that will make me feel better about that, because I know it’s inevitably coming. The 50 or the kids?

09:52
Like I got one of the kids, I got one year until my daughter goes to school and then I got three years and then what’s left after that? I know that I can’t go and travel all the time and be happy, that’s just not me. So I guess I would have to either work harder at work, know, businesses and stuff, which I’m not 100 % sure will make me happy or I find a hobby. Okay, so.

10:21
not to be giving you parenting advice, although I have a little more experience on the parenting side. You probably got like three and a half X more experience. When my first kid got married, and she got married pretty young, I remember at her wedding, her dad was crushed, just barely keeping it together, walking her down the aisle.

10:50
Even though we love the guy she married, right? Like he’s absolutely fantastic. One of the greatest people I’ve ever met in my life. Great addition to our family. My perspective was she’s taken the next step. Like this is a good thing. Like we’re just moving to another phase in our relationship, right? Like I viewed it as that. He viewed it as losing something, which I think is what you’re viewing. Like your kid’s going into that next phase for you is kind of like a loss, right?

11:18
I viewed it as like an accomplishment. Like, yes, we made it. We made it to step three. And I will say, like, I just was out to dinner with my adult son. Well, all my sons are adults, but my son who has a family last night. And I love my, I love the phase with my adult kids. Like, I love our conversations. I love the things we do together. To me, it’s 30 times better than them in high school. Like, I would never want to go back to that, right?

11:48
So I guess for me, I always look forward to like the future stuff with my kids, because I feel like it just gets better and better the older they get. But I also see what you’re saying about like it definitely does feel like your life is going to fundamentally change once your kids leave. OK, there’s a lot of uncertainty here because all your kids are close by. You can see them wherever you want. But what if one of them decides to go to the East Coast? they can go to the West Coast.

12:19
Well, you know what I’m saying, 3000 miles away and then they find someone there and then all of a sudden I don’t see them maybe once a year at most. See, but that’s the thing. Like in my mind, I don’t think I would ever like my kids, because I know I have a couple of kids that definitely do not want to stay here. Right. And are they’re in school right now. So I think when they get the opportunity, they’ll leave. And that’s fine with me because I feel like one, I want them to be happy. And I know what it’s like to live somewhere where you don’t want to be. And I moved all I mean, I graduated and moved away.

12:49
and lived away for 20 years. And we always came back. I mean, we came back two, three, four times a year sometimes. And I know for me, if I have a kid that lives in, please don’t live in Seattle, but if I had a kid that lived in Seattle, I would be in Seattle three or four times a year. And I also feel like, and obviously I’m spoiled, my kids live very, very close to me, some of them with me. But I feel like if they moved, I would still see them.

13:18
pretty regularly. On the flip side, no one can afford a house anyway. They’re not going anywhere. They’ll be back. I was a little shocked to hear that you didn’t want to be in Vegas though. What’s up with you? I don’t understand. think when you’re in a rut, for me personally, when I’m in a rut, I just want to withdraw.

13:45
I don’t wanna have to talk to people. I don’t wanna have to put on the happy face. I don’t wanna have to. And I also don’t have a personality of like, we all have these friends where when you talk to them, it’s like Eeyore, right? Everything’s bad, everything’s wrong. Like every conversation you have, the sky is falling. And I don’t wanna be that person personally. That’s just not, so when I’m feeling down on where I am, my business, whatever it is, I don’t wanna be around people because I don’t wanna have to like,

14:14
fake it and I also don’t want to be the person that’s like, well, everything’s terrible. I always want to make people feel better when they’re around me. I think that’s part of why I just didn’t want to be around anybody. I see. I don’t really talk about that stuff. I usually just find a solution. Well, if you’re not Asian, you need to talk about things.

14:44
That’s true. We’re not used to talking white people haven’t been trained to shove everything so deep that you can just continue on with your life. It’s funny for me, talking about things doesn’t make me feel better. Solutions make me feel better. Or direction makes me feel better. and I actually agree with you. But for me though, I don’t necessarily think that I can always or anyone can always come up with those solutions by yourself.

15:12
Sometimes you need outside perspective to help you get to that solution. And so for me saying like, hey guys, I didn’t really wanna go on this trip. And then being able to have a conversation like, why not? And then I say, well, this is kind of where I’m at. I gave three things or whatever. And then being able to kind of talk through and having other people’s perspective, people who know me really well, right? Obviously, I don’t think you should have this conversation with your neighbor three doors down.

15:42
I actually thought it was really helpful because we all kind sat around and had conversations of like, yeah, I felt that way too, or, you know, but look at this part of your business or look at what you’re doing here. Have you thought about this and like helping you shift perspective? That’s where I think that talking about it and it’s why I think masterminds are so good, right? You go into a mastermind, you bring up a, usually it’s a business problem, right? You bring up a business problem. You probably know the answer.

16:10
to your business problem, but you’re probably looking at it the wrong way. And so it takes the other people in the group with a fresh perspective to help you see things that are probably right in front of you, but you’ve just missed. I think one thing that’s worked for me in the past is when I’m not sure which direction to take, I just pick any direction and then just go with it.

16:34
It’s hard to do. I really am not. I want to make a comment so bad, I’m not going to. Why? I ended up in a 27 year terrible marriage. So I don’t recommend. Edit, edit, Well, don’t have to stick with that for seven years. I’m a sticker wither. You know that. That’s true. are. are. Actually, to a certain extent, so am I, right? I’ve been doing the

17:02
similar things for a long time. That’s why I don’t like to pick something because I’m like, if this is the wrong move, I’m in for the long haul in the wrong direction. Well, OK, if someone was totally a failure, you would stop, right? Although I edit, edit, So I’ll tell you one of the things that really helped me while I was in Vegas. And I think for people who.

17:29
If you’re, because I think, and I know you don’t relate to this, but I think there are times when people are so overwhelmed that they cannot pick a direction. There is a point of overwhelm where even picking a direction is impossible. And I think one of the best things that you can do when you’re in that space is to do something radically different. And I’m not talking about like, choose your own adventure, but like.

17:57
So what I decided to do was a cold plunge. And you know I do not like the cold, I do not like cold water. So doing a cold plunge for me was almost like a fear, right? Because I was like, if I go in this cold plunge, I will never warm up. In my mind I was like, I will be cold for the next three days. And so I did something that I didn’t wanna do, it was totally out of my comfort zone, and it wasn’t this massive thing, right? I just did one shift.

18:25
and what I normally do. And that was actually, I don’t wanna say it was life changing, so I can’t give it that much credit, but it was definitely, it broke me out of that rut pretty quickly. And I don’t know what, mean, people who like are really into cold plunges probably understand the science behind it, I don’t. But I will say doing something really different that was out of my comfort zone was actually really helpful in sort of getting me out of that rut because it just was a complete,

18:55
like environment change for me.

18:59
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19:28
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19:40
So having done that before, it feels great in the moment, but I mean, you gotta do it regularly. Are you doing it regularly now? Where am I? I live in Florida. We don’t have cold plunges. It’s all 87 degrees. No, no, you just need a bucket. You can buy it on Amazon. You need a bucket. No, and I thought about it. I was like, oh, could do this regularly. And I could, right? I think my gym actually has something like that.

20:07
But for me, it was like just a jolt to my system. So I can think of other ways to do this, right? Like there’s a lot of people who like, I’ll never do a cold plunge. I would say if you are a casual drinker, quit alcohol for like a month, right? If you do not exercise at all, tell yourself you’re gonna walk a mile every night, right? Do something completely out of your routine.

20:33
It doesn’t have to be some you don’t to jump out of an airplane or you know do anything I mean you can absolutely if that’s what you feel like you need to do, but do something that Would present to you something that’s a challenge or a difficulty that you normally would not take on So for me getting in a cold plunge was like and it’s so funny because we were talking Liz and I were talking about this yesterday We were like we’re gonna do the cold plunge and we went in it

20:58
And I think we were in it for like 45 seconds and we’re like, done, high five, like ran out of it and got back in the hot tub, right? And as we sat in the hot tub again, we were like, you know, we could probably, we could probably go longer, right? Like that was kind of wimpy, like 45 seconds, that doesn’t really seem like we really gave it the best that we could. So we went back in, we went in for five minutes. It might’ve been a little longer than five minutes, because we kind of stopped tracking after a bit. But.

21:26
Not only did you feel absolutely fantastic when you get out of a cold plunge, which is crazy to me, but the feeling of accomplishment and feeling of doing something that I normally would have been like, absolutely not, I will never do this, actually gave me, I don’t know what the right word is, it propelled me kind of through the month of January and got me to a point where I was like.

21:52
All these things that I was really down on kind of helped me flip the script on them and allowed me to like pull some levers that I probably wouldn’t have seen because it just put me in a completely different mindset.

22:05
I always need something to push me into action. Like I told you about how I’m doing those sprints now, right? So for everyone listening, I’m now doing these 400 meter sprints where you sprint and then you walk 90 seconds and you sprint and you walk 90 seconds and you do that 10 times. The reason is because I play ultimate and I was playing with these 30 year olds, like I’m 50 now I’m playing with these 30 years and they kept kicking my butt.

22:34
And so that’s what pushed me into doing that. Similarly, when I got my blood work done, like the first time and my everything was high, right? And cholesterol and triglycerides is probably too much information, but I ended up just cutting out all fried foods and beef. You know how much I beef. So I need something external. And what I, what I, guess I can’t relate to what you’re talking about is like, if you’re stuck in this rut and you can’t pick a direction,

23:02
Is doing something outside your comfort zone easier than picking a direction? So I think, yes, it is. And here’s why. Because I think if you’re like, oh, I need to pick a direction with my business or I need to pick a direction with my life, that has like pretty long standing consequences. Right. Like if you’re like, I’m just going to quit selling on Amazon. Right. And that’s your that’s your direction. That might be a really bad idea and a decision to make when you’re in the depths. Right. But if you say, hey,

23:30
I’m gonna walk a mile every day before I go to bed, right? Something like that. You’re not gonna damage, I mean, you’re not in risk of losing your house, right? You’re just making a change. And I think there’s something about consistency, making the change, committing to something.

23:51
and then seeing the success of it, like, hey, I’ve done this. It’s why all those fitness tracker apps work. It’s why all the goal setting. It’s like why all those things work because it allows you to see your progress. And then once you realize, like, hey, if I did this for 30 days, it’s like I was talking to Lars. He takes a cold shower every morning. I find that to be horrific. you know. The same as your cold It is, but every single day. Sure. But he’s like,

24:20
I feel amazing, right? He’s like, I feel amazing, it’s great. And everybody I know that does that feels amazing and says it’s great. I’ve never met anyone that’s like, keep doing it even though it’s absolutely miserable. They’re like, no, I don’t really like it, but I feel so great afterwards. But I think part of it is actually physiologically you feel great, but also there’s a sense of accomplishment. It’s the same concept of making your bed every morning, right? Starting your day with the wind, checking something off. I think making some sort of change externally.

24:47
is a way to sort of kickstart you into making another decision that has a lot more consequences than giving up alcohol for a month or something like that.

25:02
I think the secret solution to all of this is exercise. I know. We talk about this a lot. I agree. After I do my sprints, I feel horrible for about 20 minutes while I’m trying to recover. take a three-hour nap, and then I’m very motivated. But after my shower, after that run, I feel amazing, like I can accomplish anything.

25:27
So now my first instinct whenever I feel anything now is to go lift weights or do my sprints. But see, that’s exactly the point, right? After I did the cold plunge and I was like, wow, I did something that I thought I could not do. I was very motivated to start doing other things that maybe fear was keeping me back or apprehension or whatever it was, right? It sort of kicked me through that and got me to a point where I was excited about things again. Yeah.

25:56
So it’s similar to a workout, the cold plunge. It like resets your brain. After I did Wim Hof, I remember when we did the cold plunge, I felt amazing. In fact, I was doing that Wim Hof stuff, the breathing for a long time afterwards until I just kinda felt I didn’t need it anymore. But maybe the cold plunge is just like going running or something. Yeah, and you know what’s interesting? Everybody that I meet that’s like really grounded,

26:26
and just has a very assured presence about them, all of them do breathing exercises, every single one of them. It’s the common thread with these people. So to me, it’s like, do think doing these external things, whatever it is, right? I do agree with you. think if you can get out and do some sort of exercise, some sort of movement, I think that’s a game changer. But if you’re not at the point where you’re ready to do that, anything that you can,

26:55
change, right, in your lifestyle, I think can help you get out of a rut in your business, even though it’s not necessarily related to your business.

27:06
On your last comment, every assured grounded person I’ve ever met, if I think they’re like that, that means I don’t know them well enough. I know everybody has their things. Perfect example, this is Dana. She’s a very balanced individual. Does she have issues? Absolutely, we all do. I feel like a lot of her balance comes from her routines. She does her

27:36
yoga stretching, she does her breathing exercises, she has a whole thing that she does, right? She’s very, very grounded in her lifestyle, which I think helps her and has helped her in the past make really smart decisions in her business. Yeah, yeah. I think one thing that’s helped me also is you mentioned this already, like a routine. I’m gonna do this every day.

28:03
Forever or you know for like 30 days or 60 days for me. It’s usually forever. Because if. Let’s just take working out for let’s take this running. I hate running. You know I hate running right? And before when I said I was going to run once a week, I can never maintain that for some reason. But now that I’ve told myself I’m going to do it every other day. It’s easy. And then because.

28:32
Even though I hate every minute of it. Believe me, I hate every minute of it. Because my feel like my lungs are burning and whatnot. But just putting it. No, know I used to do them. It’s absolutely horrible.

28:46
But I also have that goal of being able to keep up with those 30 year olds in the back of my mind also. Everything that I do actually, I have a very regimented routine for my business. Right? Like I do content on a certain day. I prepare lesson plans. I do office hours on a certain day. I spend one day thinking, which is very helpful also. But if I didn’t have that routine,

29:12
I’d like all over the place, I think. Yeah. So I think that’s another good point and another step that you should take if you’re in a rut is to create that routine. But I would say throw out every piece of advice you’ve received on what the routine should look like and create your own routine. So here’s the thing, like for me, most people are like, get up, first thing, exercise, do this, whatever. Well, like I have literally zero energy at the end of the day.

29:39
So for me, if I spend most of my morning like exercising, then getting ready, blah, blah, blah, by the time I get on my computer, I’m already like past my peak performance time. Whereas I do much better if I get on my computer at 7 a.m., right? And if I get up early and I get all of the like hard thinking, processing things out of the way from like seven to 11, right? And then I can go to the gym at 2.30, right? And I can will myself at the gym.

30:09
But I can’t will my brain into being creative. You know what I mean? Or I can’t will my brain into problem solving when I don’t have anything left. But I can will myself to walk around the block. Or take a cold shower. These things that are purely physical actions are much easier. And so I think everybody knows when they’re the most productive. I know people that are for a fact super productive in the evening.

30:38
I don’t understand that. I did not get that gene in any way, or form. But there are people who work really well in the evening. And so all this get up super 4 a.m., know, blah, blah, blah. That is not that they cannot try to have that routine because they read it in a book. They need to schedule their day around productivity when they’re the most productive. So I think throw out everything you’ve read about scheduling and make a schedule that is the best for you and how your body operates and how your brain functions.

31:06
and don’t listen to anybody else. If you’re not an early bird, don’t try to be one. I know a lot of people talk about it, but like, and for me, I love it because it totally jives with how I work, but it doesn’t for some people. I find those people like, they’re never as productive as they could be until they make the shift themselves. So I keep getting hung up on this. back to your cold plunge thing. So what happened after that? For me, it was just temporary.

31:36
but it seemed like it had a much longer lasting effect on you. So first of all, so it probably didn’t hurt that I was in the cold plunge with Liz. So while we were in the cold plunge, we literally came up with four business ideas in that five minutes. And we’re like, you know, what about this? What about that? We should do this. What do you think of this? So we went in and like literally came up with a business plan in that five minutes for something that we, her and I have been throwing around for 12 years, right?

32:03
So I think part of it was it just like kind of shocked our brain into like, wait, we could do this. So I think part of it was just the clarity that we got while we were actually in the water. And then I think the bigger thing for me was if I can get in the cold plunge and do this, then I can do a lot of other things that I have like, I don’t feel like I’m qualified or oh, don’t belong here. Oh, I shouldn’t be doing this.

32:31
no, I do belong, I can do it, I should be doing it, right? So it sort of broke through some of my own personal limitations I put on myself. And I think that’s what happens to anybody when they do something that they didn’t think they could do, thought was too hard. You look at Leslie Samuel, I know we’ve talked about him a couple times, he did that 75 hard, which I think is absolutely nuts. But if you can look it up, it’s a whole workout routine. But like,

32:58
The progress I’ve seen in his life from the changes he’s made in his fitness is like insane in his business life, right? Like the carryover is crazy. He’s like landed all these gigs and he’s doing all these things now that he wasn’t doing before. And I think they’re related, right? I think they’re related because he convinced himself he could do something really difficult and that leads to convincing yourself you can do other things that you doubted about yourself before.

33:25
It is hard to do 75. Oh yeah. I am not endorsing that by the way. What I mean by that is like to get yourself mentally prepared to do that. That sounds way overwhelming than any right? Yes. That’s why I’m not saying do 75 hard to get out of a rut. If you could do 75 hard, you’re probably not in the worst rut. But it’s just committing to doing something right every single day. That’s difficult.

33:54
or a change. Maybe it doesn’t have to be difficult, it just has to be different. I think that’s the other thing. It doesn’t necessarily have to be take a cold shower every day. It could be, I’m going to, here’s a big one, I’m not going to go on my phone after X time at night. I’m going to put my phone on the other side of the room and I’m going to read a book. Or I’m going to go to bed a half hour earlier. I’m going to wake up a half hour earlier, whatever it is.

34:21
But just making a change to, I just think these types of changes are a little shock to your system and then allow you to sort of reset other parts of your system as well. I mean, what you’re trying to say is break your regular routine. We were just talking about establishing a routine, but maybe the routine you’re in kind of sucks. I it probably does, right? I meet very few people who…

34:48
who are like, I have the best routine. Most of them are like, oh man, I’m a mess. Most people are probably not operating in a way that they want to operate at this point, if they’re feeling that way. Breaking the routine and then creating a new one, I think, is a big thing. I will say, think it all starts with, this is all very hard to do if you’re in a rut, which is why I think you’ve got to tell somebody.

35:18
Most people, I know you can do this, but most people can’t just will themselves into the next thing. I think you got to tell somebody that that you respect who can kind of help you. Yeah, that’s what I’m saying. OK, right. Don’t tell Steve. Don’t tell us. I’m saying don’t tell Steve. Yeah, I think at least for me and maybe like the Asians in the audience can relate to this then. Like

35:47
Go out and run around the block, right? And get yourself tired. And then once you’re in that euphoric state, which is where I always get after working out, just pick a direction and go with it. I think the problem, at least for me, has always been commitment. Like it’s a big thing to commit to something since I know I’m going to do it for like three to five years, right? And so I ended up just kind of waiting on the sidelines because I’m not ready to commit to that thing.

36:17
but I always make better decisions when I’m exhausted. I don’t know why that is. Cause you don’t feel stressed when you’re already tired. No, no, cause you’re just tired. And you have a clear mind. Like I wish I could make all my decisions when I’m running. when I do this trail by my house where there’s a hill, it’s about 0.8 miles up. And during that time, like it’s miserable. But once you get to the top,

36:47
and when you’re on your way down, it’s all downhill back to the car. That is like when my mind is the clearest. I’m just not willing to go through that pain to get that clear mind all the time. And for the white people in the audience, get a therapist. Well, it’s the same thing I would imagine, right? So you told someone that made you feel better, right? And then you talked to the right person, in which case this was Liz, right?

37:16
And then you did something kind of out of the ordinary to get that clear mind, which in your case was the cold plunge. And then you came up with the direction. And I do think, and I don’t want to, this is the one thing I want to make sure we don’t do. I don’t want to minimize like being in a rut. I know there are people that are in truly like really bad places. And at that point, you know, it might not be as simple as just jumping in a cold plunge or running up a hill.

37:42
so I don’t want to make it sound like this is a cure-all, but I think for a lot of us, it really is just about jarring your routine, right? Coming up with something new, switching things around. And I think the other thing that, and this is what really, I don’t want to say bothered me about Seller Summit, because I thought Seller Summit was fantastic. The people that didn’t come because they didn’t feel like they were in a good place, to me, those are the people that needed to be there the most.

38:11
to surround yourself with other people who want you to succeed. And I think Liz in her closing keynote talked about, you’re the sum of the five people you spend the most time with, right? And how she heard that quote like 10 or 11 years ago and it really like changed the direction of her life. And I think that’s so true, right? Think about where you’re investing your time, who you’re hanging out with, who you’re interacting with on a regular basis and are those people impacting you in a positive way? Are they helping you?

38:41
Because I mean, I think we all have friends that are perfectly happy to let us be in a rut, right? And are perfectly happy to let it, you might not have, because all your friends are Asian. But if you have white friends, I think there’s like, we all have groups of people who really push us to be better. And we have people who let us sit, right? And so make sure that you have some people in your life that are gonna push you.

39:08
to move you forward and to keep you making that forward progress.

39:13
Hope you enjoyed this episode. If it resonated with you, I’d love it if you shared it with a friend, left a review, or reached out to let me know what hit home. For more information and resources, go to mywifequithejob.com slash episode 594. Once again, the recordings for Seller Summit 2025 are now on sale over at sellersummit.com. And if you’re interested in starting your own e-commerce store, head on over to mywifequithejob.com and sign up for my free six-day mini course. Just type in your email.

39:42
and I’ll send the course right away via email.